Whatever you do, do not get WD40 in your eye

It burns. It burns like nothing else except how a proper burn burns....... and then it burns some more. I tried all sorts of things to ease the burning but nothing worked. Nothing, that is, until I stuck my whole face in the chest freezer. Finally, amongst the frozen gooseberries and bits of pheasant, I found some relief. And then, a few days later, I did it again. Idiot. 

That was a decade ago and my eyes have been WD40 free ever since. I am extra careful, of course, but I do so love that smell.

I had the WD40 out today in preparation for my next big gardening task - pruning all the climbing roses and grapevines. 

My trusty old secateurs have taken a bit of a battering over the last few weeks of clearing and tidying the herbaceous borders and they were no way near their best. What they needed was a jolly good clean and sharpen. So out comes the kit - a small amount of wire wool, WD40 (mmmmmm.....), a fine-grade sharpening stone and a black permanent marker. 

Here you see my mucky old secateurs. They are Felco no.7's with the swivel handle, designed specifically to reduce the stress on the hand that comes after a long day (or week or year) of pruning. They are special - they were a present from my grandparents and they have been by my side (more specifically, strapped to my backside in a belted holster) since 2001. 

I use the wire wool to clean around all the little mechanisms. The WD40 helps with the cleaning and also helps free up the swivel mechanism, which had been less swivelly than I would like. The permanent marker trick is hijacked from Monty Don. He showed the 'Gardeners World' audience, including myself, the coolest trick and I have never looked back. You colour in the secateurs' one cutting edge with the marker pen and you proceed to gently sharpen with the stone. You know the blade is fully sharpened when all of the black has gone. Genius!

Once the blade is sharpened, turn the secateurs over and work the stone over the other side to get rid of any bevelled edge. Don't go in at an angle because a pair of secateurs only has one cutting edge. 

If you don't feel confident enough to sharpen your secateurs yourself, don't worry; Felco have a terrific service department and for a few pounds you can send them off and they will come back as good as new. Mine will need a service soon - the only thing is, I can't bear to be parted from them!

Here's how my constant companions looked after a few minutes of tlc. 

Worn, aged but clean, sharp and ready for some hardcore pruning action. Roses, prepare to be well and truly pruned.